I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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