Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
