he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
