Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Green mimosas i think yes
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
