ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
