you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
That was an excessively violent trivia night
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
My ass is underappreciated
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
