I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
