So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
