Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize