Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
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