this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
