You really coming over, don't trick.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
