Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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