so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Randomize
