doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize