She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
