Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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