Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
