hotel room ftw
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize