come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
