well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
