I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
