You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
