either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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