You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
