actually, I'm a sock model
No subtext here. People are naked.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
