I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
