Dignity is for republicans.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
