Rock
Scissors
Fuck
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
