U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize