Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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