can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
