it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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