Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We left the knife in your bed.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
