people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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