The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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