Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
