i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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