closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
