Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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