i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
