Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize