True but thats because hes a fetus.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
