guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
