C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Randomize