Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
