today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
