So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize