This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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