I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
