I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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