And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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